I’ve been arguing and thinking and talking about the Green Party since 2000, when I lived in an apartment building in Southeast Portland where most of the residents voted for Ralph Nader because, as they explained, there was no difference between Al Gore and George W. Bush. These people were quite fond of drumming circles, co-ops for food and co-ops for bicycle repairs and anything, as I recall, that even hinted at “ethnic.” This included beautiful woven blankets bought at some fair trade place, music – lots and lots of music – and various medicinal spices that came bottled and packaged with an abundance of Native American lore.
I’m a bitch with the keyboard. I know that. What I also know is that in writing this blog post, the challenge is not to remember enough details from 11 years ago to paint an accurate picture. The challenge is to keep this from becoming a book-length blog post, because the details are simply endless. In a way it’s a cheap shot to make fun of people for their music collections and the spices they use. But in another way, I think it’s a perfect metaphor for the Green Party. In the same way that owning a blanket woven in a village somewhere in Ecuador does not make you an expert on Central America, or reduce or excuse your contribution to the local comfort vs. global misery equation that is the U.S. economy, I don’t think the members of the Green Party, by simply signing on, are making even the slightest dent in the stranglehold that two major parties have on politics in the U.S. of A. In fact, I think they’re doing the exact opposite.
But back to 2000. There were two words that really captured the hearts and souls of my former neighbors: grass roots. Hence, Ralph Nader for President. So, believing that the root of grass roots take hold in the front yard, I started asking what they thought of the county commission, the city council, the school board. They had no idea. They frowned and glared and dismissed me with talking points no more original or thoughtful than those spewed forth by conservative Christians. And I, in response, quoted another KBOO hostess, who said of the Green Party one beautiful morning in 2000, “They just lookin for someplace to park they Volvo.”
So here we are 11 years later, and if the KBOO program was any indication, the only thing that’s changed with the Green Party crowd is that the Volvo got traded up for a Prius. We’re barely two years out of an eight-year administration headed by a man that was, according to the Green Party, no different than Al Gore. We’re involved, for now, in two wars, the schools are deplorable, we’re more up to speed on the particulars of the pensions enjoyed by government employees than we are about bonuses and bailouts in the banking industry and we’ve been tricked, willingly for the most part, into confusing the most benign rules being imposed on health insurance companies with full-blown Communism. Would we be in the same place had Al Gore been sworn in on a frigid January morning in 2001? Were the realities of 2011 inevitable back in November of 2000? I don’t know, of course, but I have fantasies about asking my former neighbors their opinion on that, now that we’ve all had more than a decade to reflect.
That conversation has to remain in the realm of fantasy for now. Between the election and the day I moved out of my apartment in September 2002, I made a point of saying “Yay Bush!” every time I saw any of my neighbors, and by the time I moved most of them would barely make eye contact with me, never mind say goodbye or wish me well. But this conversation – the one I’m having with myself and, if you’re reading, with you – does not have to wait at all.
Recently, I have had glimpses into what I consider a vision from hell: It’s November of 2012 and the spotlights are on Southeast Portland and the people have spoken and it’s not looking so good for Barack Obama. Do I blame the Green Party for Gore’s loss in 2000? I sure do. When there are two leading candidates in a race, one leaning in one direction and one in the other, and then a third candidate enters who leans more in the same general direction as one of the original two than the other, that automatically and usually irrevocably strengthens the position of the candidate who leans in the opposite direction. Ralph Nader didn't give W. more votes; he simply gave him a larger lead. Is it fair to blame the Green Party for splitting the vote in 2000? I don’t know, and I don’t care. I don’t think simple math is fair or unfair. If you’re looking for fair, ask Mommy to fluff the pillows.
The biggest challenge I have with the Green Party (and the Tea Party, for that matter) is that I cannot condemn it outright. That’s because I think a lot of the ideas are great. I could get behind many of the initiatives because I do believe that if we destroy the earth, something we’re making excellent progress on as far as I can tell, the rest of it doesn’t really matter because it’ll all be over.
What concerns me about the Green Party is the people. My opinion is influenced, of course, by the fact that I live in Portland, which is to the Green Party what New York is to the bankers. The people in this party strike me as overwhelmingly white, middle class, privileged, spoiled and, worst of all, lazy. They want a grass roots president but they cannot be bothered to learn about the government in their own community. They want to end our dependence on fossil fuels, as do I, but when it’s time to learn about the billions – if not trillions – of dollars that are invested in ensuring that that dependence continues, forget about it. They take the same approach to healthcare. They are suburban teenagers challenging their parents on curfew hours. They want it their way, right now, right here, no exceptions.
In fairness, the Tea Party operates on the same premise as far as I can tell. Unlike the Green Party, though, the Tea Party at least shows up at events, including elections. Where was the Green Party last November? At bikram yoga? Schlepping back and forth between Whole Foods and New Seasons in search of fresh, “locally sourced” organic produce that you have to be at least slightly special to afford regularly? Maybe they felt too disenfranchised this time around, too alienated to show up at the polls, which, in Oregon, is any place – including the toilet seat – where you’re able to make marks on a piece of paper with a No. 2 pencil. So again, true to the recurring nightmare that is the Green Party, people who are so “passionate” about reconfiguring the entire society in one clean sweep are for some reason incapable of accomplishing the most simple of tasks – voting in Oregon.
And they want to run the country? Speaking of Mommy, what I’m about to say makes me almost grateful that my own is deceased, because she’d kick my ass from one end of Saint Louis County to the next if she read what I’m about to write: I think I’d rather have W.
Though I’ve never put them in writing, I’ve shared my opinions on the Green Party before, and most people immediately assume that I’m a conservative, which is quite telling, I think: If you don’t agree with our platform and pledge allegiance to it, they seem to be saying, you must be a Republican. I just refuse to toss my vote around like candy at a parade. I cannot and I will not fill out a ballot in support of people who are proud of the fact that they have zero ability to see issues in a context that extends beyond their immediate wish list. In this country, today is the result of more than 230 years of other days, of other agendas bought and paid for in any number of ways for any number of reasons. To me, the Green Party’s approach to the centuries seems to be to wipe them clean as if they were nothing more than markings on a chalk board. It’s not an idea without appeal, but I think it’s lazy.
So back to the radio show. Toward the end of the hour a woman called in with what I think was a great question. The people who have the money aren’t going to simply hand it over, she said. The country has been built around making sure they retain the cash, and the power that goes with it, so what did David Cobb think we should do, not next November, but right now, today. Well, the hostess said, let me just jump in here. And jump she did, even though the question was clearly not directed at her. What we should do is pull out of both wars immediately and use all that money for public education. That’s what we should do, she said, that’s what must be done.
Okay.
